This weekend was a big one for me. This weekend was the first weekend in I don’t know how long that I didn’t drink. It honestly feels great. My fiancee and I cooked dinner Friday night and didn’t have any wine despite seven bottles sitting on the counter. Saturday, I went to a friend’s son’s 2nd birthday. The party was the first time I had seen many people in a while, and usually, I get timid and will head for where the drinks are. I never realized until I didn’t do that that it bothered me and made me feel weak. Like I couldn’t muster up the courage to be sociable without drinking. I used to be a lot more self-conscious and socially awkward when I was younger before I started drinking. I talk to people at work all the time sober, and those stakes are much higher than the ones at a party. Many times when I’m not drinking, I compare my “sober” social skills to the ones I have when I’m drinking. I always think, “if I were drinking, this would be easier.” Maybe cutting out drinking will make me get better at my “sober” social skills because they’re the ones I will have forever. There’s no crutch to fall back on.
After the party, my fiancee’s parents came to visit for her mom’s birthday. We went to an Italian restaurant, and they got some drinks afterward. Walking around downtown and going to dinner is another example of a time I would drink. Of course, I wouldn’t be getting hammered at any of these events, but add them up throughout the weekend. If I’m honest with myself, I would probably have two to three drinks on Friday, depending on what I’m drinking. On Saturday, we were at the party for two and a half hours, and I could’ve easily had three drinks. Add another two that night when we were out to dinner and walking around downtown. That’s seven drinks just between Friday and Saturday. It doesn’t include the beer or glass of wine after work that week or going out for a happy hour, even just for one beer. I want to get to 187 lbs, and I can’t afford the extra 700 calories that drinking brings. Seven hundred hundred calories is being generous. Unless those are only shots or light beers, most alcoholic beverages have many more calories than that. It also doesn’t include the food you’re eating solely because of your drinking and how your body metabolizes alcohol.
Now I’m not going to pat myself on the back just yet. It’s only one weekend. Many of my friends I usually drink a lot with weren’t there, so I’m not sure how I would’ve behaved if they were. With that said, I’m feeling good. I bought some new running shoes and shorts. I showed myself that I could have an excellent time socializing without alcohol, and we have good things coming this year. I’m going to visit my friend at the beach next Thursday with my other buddy. The weekend of July fourth, my fiancee and I are going to Cape May for four nights. My bachelor party is in September, then my wedding and honeymoon are in October.
I’m going to be sad when this year is over. This year will be one of the best years of my life, and I want to remember it. I want to cherish it, and I want to be present for it. That’s one my main goals is to be present for the things that I have in life. I thought yesterday that we need to look around every once in a while and realize what we accumulated and don’t mean from a material sense. No matter what we have in our lives, we will never be happy if we are always only looking forward. We have to take a look around and realize what we have before it’s gone. Nothing is permanent, and it’s not supposed to be. I want to look back and know that I enjoyed everything I had while I had it. It doesn’t mean that you won’t be sad when that thing or person is no longer in your life, but at least you won’t have the regret of not appreciating it. I think cutting down on my drinking may be a great way to ensure that I’m successful.
